iPod Mania

You gotta give credit where credit is due, and the iPod marketing team has earned some love. How the hell they’ve managed to create such a cult of drooling maniacs around an MP3 player is beyond my meager marketing skills, but they sure did a bang-up job. Then again, it is Apple and there is a built-in cult of Apple worshippers left over from the ever-declining computer hardware and OS side of the company (which is too bad, because I hear OS-X is awesome…then again, it is sitting on top of a UNIX-like base).

iPods are such a cult item that they are single-handedly increasing the theft rates on NYC subways and contributing to street crime in the UK. These things are the overpriced sneakers of the late 80’s and early 90’s when kids would get killed for their Air Jordans. The fact that the iPods are so distinctively designed means that any iPod user stands out in a crowd, what with those white ear-buds and cords dangling down from the ears.

The iPod Nano is the latest entry in the growing iPod family and the thing, much like most of the iPod devices, is a marvel of design. The Nano is absolutely tiny, hence the name. So much so that it fits comfortably in the generally-useless coin pocket of your jeans. They smartly kept the now-famous navigation tools of the iPod on the Nano so that ease of use for the already converted will be high. They’ve got a color screen that displays album art and your own photos. It comes in 2 and 4GB models using flash memory from Samsung and Toshiba. Apparently the battery even lasts 14 hours, unlike the horrible 8-9 battery life of the original iPods.

iPods aren’t just a device for listening to tunes, they’re a fashion accessory that can be seen in the suburbs, the cities and riding in the pockets of celebrities. And when my friends or family come to me and ask me about buying an iPod, what do I tell them? Stay far the fuck away.

Yep. Fuck iPods. Why? Two simple reasons: they’re overpriced and they underperform. Let’s look at the original Hard-Drive players for a moment. Why would I spend more on an iPod when I could get an iAudio that has better sound, an FM radio, voice recording functionality and it acts like a standard hard drive (which is all it is, people) with my OS? My iAudio also plays more formats (MP3, WMA, FLAC and OGG) and doesn’t require third-party software (although it comes bundled with JetAudio software), such as iTunes, to allow me to work with the system. The base body of my M3 is smaller than an iPod, but all navigation/headphone connection is handled via a wired remote. This navigation system works for me, but I could easily see how others would hate it and prefer a more standard setup. Then why not an iRiver, which is closer in price to an iPod but offers more functionality and better battery life?

How about flash players. I own another iAudio product as my flash player, one that is several years old and not as sleek as the current crop of products. However, my CW300 is, bar-none, the best sounding player on the market and also features an FM tuner and voice recording. When I purchased the CW300, there was no Apple flash memory player. Now there is the Mini, the Shuffle and now the afore-mentioned Nano. The Mini suffers the same problems as the original iPod: overpriced and underperforming. The Shuffle is nothing but a broken player repackaged as a bit of purposeful chaos by Apple; another example of marketing genius convincing people that a low-capacity player with no navigation and no real control over song-order is somehow desireable. The Nano is still overpriced compared to its competition (the same $200 for a 2GB Nano could get me a 5GB competitor) but the design is, as is usually the case with Apple, impeccable. Of course, someone needs to explain to me the purpose of viewing photos on a screen that’s smaller than most digital camera LCDs (on any MP3 player, for that matter). There also seems to be some serious concerns about the durability of the screen.

And regardless of all the hardware issues, there’s the fact that you must use iTunes to use your iPod. I personally tested the store portion of iTunes and will never use it because of the restrictive DRM, much like I won’t use any of the existing online music retailers. I won’t rehash what I’ve already written about DRM in this piece. I don’t like being forced to use third-party software to communicate with a device that is, at its core, nothing more than a hard drive. Apple is also extremely restrictive in what formats it supports for their players, which seems ironic considering how much bitching there has been about the closed nature of their evil twin, Microsoft, over the years. Besides, if I want to rip a CD, I’ll use a high-quality tool like Exact Audio Copy over iTunes any day of the week.

So why are the damn things so in demand? Because Apple is a genius when it comes to marketing and they made sure to take advantage of their built-in army of fanbois. Because Apple was smart enough to develop iTunes and get the record labels on board during the most tumultuous times of the file sharing retaliation. Becuase Apple knew that by dealing with the labels iTunes would have the best possible selection of purchasable tunes and because iTunes purchases can only be played by iTunes or on an iPod, it would be a ready-made sales tool. Because Apple knew that, even though their profit margins were non-existent for iTunes due to the greed of the labels, it would be a driving force for sales of the iPod where the margins were much greater. Because all of the previous and a great sense of design has turned iPod into a fashion accessory and even a status symbol. It’s one hell of a marketing coup and, like most marketing coups, it makes no sense at all. Consumers are being fleeced coming and going, and they’re eager for the opportunity. People are idiots and sheep.

Like I tell all my friends and family, take a moment to look at your options. There is nothing inherently wrong with an iPod and if all you want is a fashion accessory then, by all means, pick one up immediately. If, however, you want a great sounding, easy-to-use, reliable and functional MP3 player that doesn’t force you to use specific products, avoid iPod and Apple at all costs. There are lots of alternatives and, like any expensive purchase, you’ll do better if you shop around.

This entry was posted on Saturday, September 24th, 2005 at 10:26am and is filed under Opinion. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response or trackback from your own site.