Are Kids Really This Dumb?
Say you’re on a vacation on an island off the coast of Massachusetts, hanging with a few friends and having a real good time. Unfortunately, as with everything, the good times must end. Say you’re a young fella who has to leave the island for an SAT camp, which is probably going to be about as much fun as ritual flogging. You don’t want to go, and your friends, dedicated as they are to you, don’t want you to leave. What do you do?
Well, if you’re a crew of spoiled 16 and 17 year olds, you might consider calling in a bomb threat to the ferry service. That’s always a good idea. Because in these troubled times with the threat of terrorism on everyone’s mind and the fact that bombs had been exploding in London only a few days prior, bomb threats are certainly a low-profile way to make sure that your friend doesn’t have to go home just yet. Besides, it’s only scaring the bejeezus out of a bunch of tourists and shutting down all traffic to and from the island for the night, for everyone. Oh, and don’t worry about the profits lost by the ferry company. What’s the big deal?
All in the name of a never-ending summer. Of course, I guess it could end in felony charges. Oh Daphne, Brendan, Brett and unnamed juvenile, how will you bear the long hours apart in lock-down? Of course, with names like Daphne, Brendan and Brett, you can pretty much assume that they’ll get a fine and a stern talking-to before heading back to their private schools. Other acquaintences of these folks on the island have come to their defense:
“The minute they hung up the phone, they knew they had messed up,” said the teenager. “They never meant to do anything.”
I love it when people say stupid shit like “they never meant to do anything.” I beg to differ: they meant to disrupt ferry service so that they could get what their self-centered, selfish asses wanted. I’d be willing to bet that it was only when they realized that they might be in trouble that they felt any remorse.
